Lost Soul!

Sometimes life is so unfair, for how much you deeply cared and loved a person but seems that no matter how you wish for him to change for his own betterment your actions seems so futile. From my memories as a kid i adored him, he’s my confidante, my friend and I’m his pet. But as I grew up, slowly realized how fool I was for he cared only for himself and less for his family. Prestige, high degree of education, vices (packs and packs of cigarettes and bottles of liquor) are his priority.

I would say, he’s responsible, but not enough to give us more fulfilling and richer lives. He is everyone’s friend for he always provide and give what they want from him even if it cost him a lot from his family. At first I can’t fathom his goal in life but as I aged and became more mature answer kept pouring my mind.

As much as possible I want to cling on happy memories of my childhood, those good old days full of laughter for I was a child then who knew nothing but to play and have some fun. But as you start to have a grasp of your life, everything is changed.

As for now, still his best friend is his unwavering hunger for liquor and sticks and packs of cigarettes and we are his foe for this.

I can’t imagine how he loathes us if we dared to speak against his vices for he is the victor, the righteous and no one, nobody will go against him for that.

I don’t know how to approach him sometimes words are better left unspoken and hearts of caring souls just wander.

Life upon contemplation…

I guess we’ve come to a point that we reassess our lifestyle and future in living here in the Middle East; as what we always wanted is to give the best that we could to our children. Being here and running a smooth sailing yet uncompetitive life is nothing but a waste of our youth, the drive for competence is sapped and our minds and souls crave for some profound and rich fully lived life.

I want to live with my family in a country wherein my rights would be respected, wherein we’ll not be bounded by some backward traditions, cultures and laws. A place wherein we’ll not be limited because we are expatriates but wherein we can justly assert our rights as individuals and as human beings; unfortunately here we can’t move freely as one would want to.

As for weighing the pros and cons, I would say that life in a European country or better go back to our country would be better for us, especially for our children than here. Hope that we could materialize everything the soonest…so live below your means and save more in order to move forward faster and attain those goals and dreams.


We are on the waiting mode for our new helper and still fingers crossed on finding a new two bedroom flat that would fit and satisfy our need for a quite bigger space than would fit all our furniture and not deprive our toddler and an upcoming baby for a space to play on.

Hopefully, we would like her (our new maid) and all would be on a smooth sailing basis. And as for the flat, how I wish that we could transfer before I give birth.

Goodbye Chocolates!

The other day was my monthly check up with my doctor and she told me that I gained already ten kilos and I’m just on my sixth month of pregnancy. During my first trimester I was so cautious with my food intake that mostly of my meals especially when we dine out includes only a Caesar salad or a not-that-fatty foods but as I progressed on my 2nd trimester that’s the time that I was hooked on and always demanding that we eat in Applebee’s with their mushroom steak and worst enjoyed and forgot that almost every weekend or everyday we eat in fast foods or in eat-all-you can restaurants.

To make the situation more gastronomically appealing for all us, we bought recipe books on Italian foods, chicken menus, stir fry and sea foods and to accompany that we even bought red and white wine to be used in cooking for the menu that requires some wine in it.

Continue reading “Goodbye Chocolates!”

I’m not a superwoman!!!

Being a mother to my nearly twenty months old daughter and to a soon baby boy (I’m on my sixth month) and a stay-in-the-house wife sometimes irked me by how other people or worst some friends address this situation to me. OK! I resigned myself from being a super woman; juggling my work before and being on my first month of conception of my first born to just a plain housewife but it doesn’t mean that I have no worth at all. Comments like this really have a nasty blow on me: “Why you bring another baby?” “Don’t you want to go back to work?” or simply but very downright statement like “Oh! You’re pregnant again?” A mixture of irritating and in a joyous manner utterance of curiosity.

As much as possible I want to direct them with positive answer, but explain to them my priorities in life? Why the heck? I just give them short but direct to the point thoughts for them to ponder on.

Continue reading “I’m not a superwoman!!!”